The other night I suggested a 'cinco de mayo' margarita night, hoping it would reunite what has become a splintered group of young artists.
How wrong I was - if anything, that night further solidified the divisions. Perhaps due to A. the strain/stress, or because B. many people here are enjoying the escape of this experience and are sad about returning to reality, or C. many folks here are more in need of therapy than voice lessons and their comfort level is such that they are just being themselves by now - or a combination of the three: as alcohol was consumed and abused, I found myself amidst such negativity, such downright mean-spiritedness, such self-centeredness, as I had never experienced before.
I left incredibly depressed, and determined not to socialize with this group any more, for my own spirit's sake - which should be easy, given that it ends in two days. However, we still had a master class yesterday, and I was very proud of myself for my ability to put my best self forward, controlling what I could about the situation, keeping my focus, stepping up my game in the face of what are clearly resentful and jealous colleagues, and protecting myself from that which is not beautiful nor loving.
If I have learned nothing else here, this lesson is huge.
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